"Memorial Day" - by Kristy

Memorial Day is celebrated annually in the United States on the last Monday of May. What is Memorial Day anyway? It is more than a 3-day weekend. It is more than swimming, barbecues, and parties. The true meaning behind this day is to honor those who gave their lives for the way we get to live ours today. Honoring those who have died in battle and those who have fought for our country is something we all hold in our hearts every day. But on this special day we come together as a country to really celebrate, to really show how deeply we care. So while enjoying this day with friends and family, try to remember what it is this day is truly for.
Just by taking 3 minutes to watch this YouTube video you will appreciate this day a little more.

Just be nice - by Monica

Photo Credit: by Jennifer Konig








In her lifetime, this is a lesson my Grandma Lucas always taught:
If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all.

This is something that has stuck with me, especially into my life as a journalist. Being a reporter, I learned a crucial lesson -- most people don't adhere to the standard that my grandma did. If we can't find something nice to say, why do we still feel the need to speak, to let our words run like acid to hurt someone else?

I have a bad habit of reading comments people make on the Oakland Press' website, especially the comments to my own articles. Most of the people who comment on the articles want to criticize. I read an article reporter Karen Workman wrote. A video of a woman in the military was included online. What were many of the comments about? How ugly readers thought the woman's lip ring was.

Seriously.

And it makes no sense to me, and it's hard not to take the comments personally. I have written an article about a non-profit organization...and received comments about how the volunteers probably only volunteered to get recognition. I always figured "Who could say anything bad about a non-profit organization?" I was wrong...people still found something negative to say.

I read an article about police officers arresting prostitutes...and readers actually criticized the police officers, saying that prostitution serves to boast the economy and that the women should be able to support themselves in this way if they want to.

Seems kind of backwards, doesn't it? Criticizing volunteers and police officers...and praising prostitutes.

Your words can serve as a powerful weapon, and I feel like, many times, people just speak to hear themselves talk instead of thinking what they are saying. Don't be the kind of person who treats humans like ants, holding magnifying glasses over them and finding pleasure in watching them squirm to somehow make yourself feel superior. Instead, be the person who raises others up instead of tearing them down.

So, I propose that everyone think before they speak -- and if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all. And if you do have something nice to say -- say it! Don't keep it to yourself. Because, trust me, people hear negativity all the time...and saying something nice to someone will be a breath of fresh air in their lives.

Being negative all the time and always needing to spend your time criticizing, it not only hurts those around you, but it also hurts yourself. If you are constantly think of ways to put others down, this does not lead to a happy life.

And if you find someone criticizing you, don't take it personally. Don't think it's a reflection of yourself, because it's not.

I read an article on ezinemagazine.com. Next time someone criticizes you, remember what was written in this article:

My experience of people that are always criticizing others is that they are deeply unhappy, have a low self esteem and perhaps even depressed. When people are depressed, sad or insecure often the world becomes very dark and they do see the enemy everywhere. Some people are very jealous of other people's success and deeply resent it. They then start to 'act' out.

It can also be a form of projection. They project onto others what they feel about themselves. When they call you a loser, really this is a direct reflection of how they feel about themselves. It is likely too that they consider this how you think about them so they get the insult out there first. The more unkind they are to you, the more distance you create between you, and this results in them trying harder to get your attention.

They feel rejected and try with inappropriate means to re-establish a connection. Look at how 'naughty children' behave when trying to get attention. The attention grabbing efforts are always negative and not positive. Is it possible this person has yet to learn these methods are not effective!

If you are an attractive, bubbly, successful, wealthy person with a nice happy home, great relationship, lovely children, nice car or any number of other things that this person does not have then this is in itself is reason for them to resent you if they are unhappy about what they lack in their own life.

When people take these pot shots at me, I generally see it for what it is. Insecurity and jealousy. I pity them and as such bear them no ill feeling. I may try to help them feel better about themselves or to gain what it is they want but do not have but ultimately if they can't quit their griping which can in the end drive even the strongest person down, then I will distance myself from them, perhaps indefinitely.

Do not let let people like this get you down and remember if you are in anyway at an advantage when compared to them their level of insecurity may make you their target.

"Steve Yzerman" by Kristy

Yesterday it was announced that Steve Yzerman was leaving the only organization he has ever been with during his National Hockey League career. Yzerman played his an entire outstanding career for the Detroit Red Wings. He hung up his skates several years ago when he decided to retire but still remained working for the team behind the scenes. Over the years Yzerman has inspired Hockeytown in Detroit and made the organization what it is today. He is an idol among so many players and fans worldwide.

Ever since Yzerman retired as a player his new dream was to someday become a general manager in the NHL. For many months now, Tampa Bay's hockey club had been offering their GM position to Yzerman and with the Red Wing's own GM, Ken Holland, getting an extension, Yzerman seized the opportunity with Tampa Bay and is following his dream.

As a Red Wing fan I was initially heartbroken over the news that he was leaving. But I soon realized, Yzerman is doing what I always preach on here to myself and everyone else, which is following his dream. I am incredibly happy for him and know he has amazing potential to turn Tampa Bay's current sorrows into an excellent organization someday. Hockeytown will always be Stevie Y's home and I hope someday he finds his way back, as all of Detroit would welcome him back with open arms.

Good luck Stevie!

"Run from the Stress" - by Kristy

Earlier this month for my birthday I got a pair of the new Reebok RunTone shoes. I was excited because it was just the gift I needed to get inspired to start running and working out again. The many physical benefits of jogging are pretty straight forward. Running is an excellent way to stay in shape and maintain a healthy lifestyle. However, I recently read a study from Duke University that proved a 30 minute jog or walk a few times a week is not only great for physical health but mental health as well. It can boost your mood just as taking antidepressants would. Why not get out there and kill two birds with one stone by improving your health and increasing your happiness?




Picture Credit: Getty Images
Interested in Reebok RunTones?: http://www.reebok.com/US/womens/runtone

Good fortune - by Monica

You only have one life to live -- your own.

Last week, I went out to eat at Stir Crazy, and that was the saying inside of my fortune cookie.

It took me a while to understand what it meant, but, after reading the essay Self-Reliance by Ralph Waldo Emerson for my American Literature class, I finally understand what it was saying. Emerson wrote, "I do not wish to expiate, but to live. My life is for itself and not for a spectactle...I must be myself. I cannot break myself any longer for you, or you."

Don't conform, don't settle, because this is the only chance of life you've got. You don't get to live someone else's life...you only get to live your own. But I think so many of us try so hard to live the life of other people. We compare our lives to other people, we get upset about what other people say to us, and we let other people effect us...at least that's my problem. So many people try so hard to make others happy that they are trying to live out the lives of others instead of their own. You will have days when others don't like your decisions, just like there are days when you won't like others decisions. So what? It's your life...just like it's their life, and we need to start living for ourselves and not for other people. If someone else does something you don't like, don't lament on it. Instead, show others who you are by what you do instead of lamenting on what others do, because this will only cause you purposeless anxiety. Because, like I said before, you only have one life to live. Your own.

I'll end with one more quote from Emerson: "Nothing can bring you peace but yourself." You will not be at peace and you will not be happy until you start being happy with yourself instead of focusing on what others think of you.

Photo credit: Getty Images (fortune cookie)

Meet me halfway project - by Monica

Read original article here.

I have only been to one country artist's concert before. Anjelica, one of my best friends, invited me to see him perform at the Armada Fair last summer, and, even though I had never heard of him previously, after she had me listen to just one song, I knew I wanted to go. Anjelica is a huge country fan, and a song by this artist helped her through a vicious break-up where her ex would mentally abuse her. He would try to get with other girls while he was with her, and then would call her crazy when she would suspect anything. And in the beginning, she would believe him.

I knew right away that this artist was someone special when she had me listen to his song "Do You Believe Me Now."

Some of the lyrics are:
So do you believe me now?
I guess I really wasn't that crazy

This song made her realize that she wasn't crazy. This song made her realize that he was trying to put her down and that she didn't deserve to be treated the way he treated her. No one deserves to be treated that way.

The best artists can make people who hear their music not feel alone and feel like someone understands what they are going through.

Jimmy Wayne is that kind of musician.

When at the concert, I realized even more that Wayne wasn't like every celeb. Many celebs were practically bought into the business with parents who were either rich or rich and famous. Not Wayne. And amidst the screaming girls in short-shorts and cowboy hats, I could tell he didn't let it get to his head or change who he was.

At the concert, Wayne told everyone that he used to be homeless. It's easy to think that the rich and the famous have it easy...but Wayne definitely wasn't handed his success. Wayne suffered a childhood I would not wish upon anyone. He was abused, sent to a series of foster homes, and was living on the streets of North Carolina by the age of 16. His story teaches a powerful lesson.

No matter where you have come from, if you work at it and believe, you have the power to achieve your dreams.

A couple weeks ago, Karen Workman, the reporter who I freelance for, e-mailed me a press release from Amy Rathburg, a catalog manager and promoter of the music publishing company Ann Wilson Music Group in Nashville, who was trying to promote a project Wayne was doing to raise awareness for homeless youth. Workman asked ME if I would like to write the article.

How ironic is that! Of all the artists, Workman wanted me to write an article about the only country artist I had seen perform live. And, after reading up on his project, I knew in a heartbeat that I wanted to bring awareness to it.

On Jan. 1, Wayne began a walk halfway across America, which he called “Meet Me Halfway,” to raise awareness for homeless children and teens. He started walking in Nashville, Tenn., and will end in Phoenix, Ariz. So far, Wayne has walked more than 1,200 miles. Wayne especially wanted to raise awareness of a growing trend of teenagers aging out of the foster care system. The term aging-out means that at age 18, teens are no longer eligible for foster care funding or health-care coverage, and may lose their place to live.

I know that many people have a hypocrisy towards the homeless, but Wayne and Rathburg shed a new light on this topic. There are so many people, especially in this economy, who fell into homelessness or were born into it. And I really hope that they both can help teach people to see a new face to homelessness -- that they do need our help, whether through money, time volunteering at a homeless shelter, or a place to stay (like the couple who gave Wayne a home and a family when they found him on the street). I have corresponded by several e-mails with Rathburg, and I can tell that she really has a passion for helping others, and it reminded me that generous people do exist in the world. This cause is something she is very passionate about and when Wayne doesn't like asking for donations, Rathburg has no problem asking for him. We are lucky to have homes over our heads and food, necessities that we take for granted. Hundreds of thousands aren't so lucky. According to a 2008 U.S. Department of Housing and Urban Development report, an estimated 671,888 people experienced homelessness in one night in January 2007. Wow! 671,888! Maybe instead of buying a DVD or going out to eat or buying a new outfit this month that you really don't need, send it to Wayne's project to help the homeless. Trust me, they could use the money more than you could. They could use the money to survive.

Rathburg and Wayne showed me that there are generous people in the world. In order to donate to this project, visit meetmehalfway.jimmywayne.com.

Visit Meet Me Halfway's blog (and add them :-) )

Jimmy Wayne on his walk:
Photo credit: musicnewsnashville.com

"Miss USA 2010" by Kristy

Last night Miss Michigan was crowned Miss USA 2010 at the pagent in Las Vegas. Rima Fakih is from Dearborn, Michigan.

Picture Credit-Associated Press

A world of more birthdays - by Monica

Yesterday was my 22nd birthday (as well as Robert Pattinson’s birthday for all you Twilight fans like me and iconic singer Stevie Wonder’s 60th). And I found myself saying, “After 21, what birthday do I have to look forward to?” My friend Brittany told me, “You have the whole rest of your life to look forward to.” And I think that’s one thing we need to remember…we do have the whole rest of our lives to look forward to, and that’s what we should be thinking about, no matter what our age is. As Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “Life is the journey, not the destination.”

On the topic of birthdays, American Cancer Society is the official sponsor of birthdays, or of creating a world with more birthdays. ACS describes their “More birthdays” movement as, “The movement for more birthdays is about everyday people coming together to make a meaningful difference. There are so many ways to create a world with more birthdays. Whether you are keeping your family healthy to stay well, finding the best resources to help a friend or loved one deal with a diagnosis on their journey to get well, or becoming active in your local community to fight back and find cures for this disease, together we can help make sure that cancer never steals another year of anyone’s life.”

There are several ways you can help people to have more birthdays. May and June are the months for Relay for Life, and you can find a calendar for Relay for Life in Michigan here. May 15 is Clarkson’s, May 22 is Oxford’s, June 5 is Auburn Hill’s and West Bloomfield’s, June 12 is Waterford’s and June 19 is Ortonville’s.

As my friend Brittany said, we have our lives to look forward to, and I, for one, would like to help people have more to look forward to.

"Laugh it Off" by Kristy

Laughter is healthy. A good laugh boosts your mood and your psyche. Did you know it has many other benefits? Laughing lowers blood pressure, boosts immune system, improves brain function, lowers risk for heart disease, and reduces negative feelings like stress, anger, and depression.

One of my favorite things about myself is the fact that I am so easily amused. It comes in handy, especially in hard times. It helps me hold my head up high. One of the most important things I look for in the people I surround myself with is a good sense of humor. It's great medicine and great to have in your life. :)

"If at First You Don't Succeed" by Kristy

"Successful people are not people who never fail. They're people who know how to fail really, really well. If they fall on their faces, they use that leverage to push themselves up higher." -Karen Salmansohn

Even Bill Gates purposefully hires people at Microsoft who have made mistakes. Why? "Because it shows that they take risks," according to Gates.

We all make mistakes, we all do things we wish we could take back. Instead of letting it hold you down, pinpoint what went wrong and how you can turn the failure around into a lesson learned.

Happy Early Mother's Day - by Monica

Read excerpt from Chicken Soup for the Soul: Thanks Mom

Sunday, May 9th is Mother’s Day.

We all have a mother, whether you consider her the best mother in the world (although I personally, think my mother has already won that award) or whether your mom was hardly there for you throughout your life. But, no matter what, you wouldn’t be here without your mom. And I say, thank God you’re here. I would like to thank my Mom for giving me the best gift anyone can ever receive. Life.

I don’t want to rub salt in the wounds of anyone who may have had a less than ideal childhood or someone who may have lost a mother. But mother’s day is a day to celebrate mothers, although I think mothers should be celebrated everyday and not just once a year. To every mother I know, they say it’s the most difficult job in the world…but hands down, the most rewarding one. So, say Happy Mother’s Day to a woman in the grocery store holding a chubby hand in her own. I can tell you right now that she gave up so much for the child whose hand she is holding, and she deserves recognition, even if it comes from a stranger. Say Happy Mother’s Day to the women in your life, biological or not, who have made you the person you are today.

I am lucky enough to have a mother who makes me feel like a blessing everyday. It’s core to our nature to feel wanted, and my mom always made me feel important. But I know women who weren’t as lucky, amazing women whose mothers didn’t make them feel wanted. And I encourage everyone, both men and women, to be “surrogate mothers” to those who may feel unwanted. Mother’s Day isn’t just about celebrating mothers, but about being a mother to those motherless.

So, happy mother’s day to moms, adoptive moms, foster moms, and step-moms. Happy Mother’s Day also to single dads who have to be both the father and mother of their children.

To all the amazing mothers out there, I would like to end with this story as thanks to you all for all that you do for your children, for all that you give up and for all the you do without nearly as much appreciation as you deserve.

Original Source: Spirituallyfit.com

By the time the Lord made woman, he was into his sixth day of working overtime. An angel appeared and said, "Why are you spending so much time on this one?"

And the Lord answered, "Have you seen my spec sheet on her? She has to be completely washable, but not plastic, have over 200 movable parts, all replaceable and able to run on diet coke and leftovers, have a lap that can hold four children at one time, have a kiss that can cure anything from a scraped knee to a broken heart -and she will do everything with only two hands."

The angel was astounded at the requirements. "Only two hands!? No way! And that's just on the standard model? That 's too much work for one day. Wait until tomorrow to finish.

"But I won't," the Lord protested. "I am so close to finishing this creation that is so close to my own heart. She already heals herself when she is sick AND can work 18 hour days."

The angel moved closer and touched the woman. "But you have made her so soft, Lord."

"She is soft," the Lord agreed, "but I have also made her tough. You have no idea what she can endure or accomplish."

"Will she be able to think?", asked the angel.

The Lord replied, "Not only will she be able to think, she will be able to reason and negotiate."

The angel then noticed something, and reaching out, touched the woman's cheek. "Oops, it looks like you have a leak in this model. I told you that you were trying to put too much into this one."

"That's not a leak," the Lord corrected, " that's a tear!"

"What's the tear for?" the angel asked.

The Lord said, "The tear is her way of expressing her joy, her sorrow, her pain, her disappointment, her love, her loneliness, her grief, and her pride."

The angel was impressed. "You are a genius, Lord. You thought of everything! Woman is truly amazing."

And she is!

Women have strengths that amaze men.

They bear hardships and they carry burdens, but they hold happiness, love and joy. They smile when they want to scream.

They sing when they want to cry.

They cry when they are happy and laugh when they are nervous.

They fight for what they believe in.

They stand up to injustice.

They don't take "no" for an answer when they believe there is a better solution. They go without so their family can have.

They go to the doctor with a frightened friend.

They love unconditionally.

They cry when their children excel and cheer when their friends get awards.

They are happy when they hear about a birth or a wedding.

Their hearts break when a friend dies.

They grieve at the loss of a family member, yet they are strong when they think there is no strength left.

They know that a hug and a kiss can heal a broken heart.

Women come in all shapes, sizes and colors.They'll drive, fly, walk, run or e-mail you to show how much they care about you. The heart of a woman is what makes the world keep turning. They bring joy, hope and love. They have compassion and ideals. They give moral support to their family and friends.Women have vital things to say and everything to give.

HOWEVER, IF THERE IS ONE FLAW IN WOMEN,

IT IS THAT THEY FORGET THEIR WORTH.

Oakland University 2010 graduation - by Monica

My favorite journalism professor Holly Gilbert, the head of the journalism department Garry Gilbert, and I

Oakland University’s graduation ceremony was Saturday, May 1st. Although the president didn’t show up to our graduation ceremony like he did for University of Michigan, students were still excited to finally celebrate the end of four or more years of college and receive their bachelor degrees. One student even glued letters to his graduation cap that spelt out “GO WINGS!”

John D. Stoll, who majored in history and minored in journalism at Oakland University in 2000, spoke at the ceremony. A fellow journalism major who sat next to me at the ceremony said, “There’s still hope for us yet,” when Stoll walked up on stage. One thing Stoll taught the almost-alumni was that when one door closes, another one opens. And I feel like, with this economy, that is something we all need to keep in the back of our minds. Stoll wanted to work for a church, and, as a Christian, he thought this was his dream job. But, after being accepted, the pastor called him up before his first day of work and told him he changed his mind. I don’t know about you, but I would be pretty bummed if I was let go from a job before I even started. But don’t feel bad for Stoll just yet. He later became a reporter for the Wall Street Journal and is now Ford Motor Company’s manager. He told students to take a job that mattered to THEM, no matter what anybody else says, and to fight for the job that some people may think is impossible to get. This is what people said when Stoll went to apply for the Wall Street Journal, and look what happened to him. Whether it’s in Michigan or another state or country, whether you just graduated college or graduated 40 years ago, remember that when one door closes, another one opens. Make this your motto when you don’t get accepted at a job interview because, who knows, maybe you didn’t get that job because an even better job is waiting around the corner that you wouldn’t have been looking for if you got that mediocre job you applied for first. And, if you’re in a job you hate, don’t settle. Look for something fulfilling, no matter what anyone else says. Afterall, this is YOUR life.

"Happy" -by Kristy

I have always prided myself on being easily amused. The smallest things can absolutely make my day. But lately, I have been struggling with what makes me happy. Something I have learned is that the best kind of happiness is the one you create on your own. The easier you can amuse yourself and make yourself happy, the better off you are. Depending on things out of your control is a helpless feeling. Depending too much on others for happiness is foolish because if they leave, you're left without.
One of the most helpless feelings I seem to be stuck with is due to measuring my happiness on things that are out of my control. I was dating a guy at the beginning of the year who made me the happiest I have ever felt. I let myself get comfortable and used to it. But then when he changed his mind and went in a different direction, what did that leave me with? Besides a bruised ego, it left me with the feeling that I was never going to find that level of happiness again. Which is why allowing your happiness to be depend on another, like I did, is a mistake. I am not saying never let other people make you happy, but use caution. Realize there is a line and be careful not to cross it and end up losing sight on all the other things that make you happy.
It's taken me probably 4 months to get myself back on track and to focus on the good. Take a moment to really think about the little -sometimes unoticed- things that make you happy. Make a list and appreciate them. Try to surround yourself with those things. It can work miracles for your moral and mood.